The Sandbox Writing Challenge #39, at the Oasis of Impromptu Promptlings asks us to consider the idea of Lost!
If you were lost, what would help you find your way?
There is more than one type of lost. The physical lost is when you can’t find your way back home (or to wherever you’re going). It’s not a comfortable place to be in. The emotional lost is scarier, however.
I have a habit, where ever I am (in the physical world), of learning all the ways to get from one place to the next. It came in handy, for instance, when I was living in NYC, and driving to the borough of Manhattan everyday for work. Everyone knows about rush hour traffic, and being in one of those forever traffic jams. So I’d get off at exits and see how to get further along I could get, should I not want to waste my time just sitting in the car and wondering exactly when it was going to start moving. Every place I lived was a new adventure in learning where all the streets ended up. The only time that I feel lost in the car is when my mind seeks to plot ahead, to know where I have to turn, and such much. I’ve found that puts me in the Land of the Lost, mentally. When I finish my mind travels, and look around at where I am in the moment, there are times when I don’t recognize the place. That’s a freak-out moment.
That belongs with the mental lost part because it is more about finding out where I am due to a mind-meld or some other strange happening. Being lost mentally, and/or emotionally is terrifying. I know when I’m driving, I will eventually see something that tells me where I am. But when I’m in a panic state of mind, I can’t think straight enough to figure out how to get back. And it leaves one with a fear of getting lost and not being able to find my way back to reality.
Of course, I’ve had a long career of working in Panic City, and I’ve learned certain things to do when I find myself spiraling out of control. I’ve learned about putting together a survival kit. Often it works wonders, and I’m back to Peace of Mind. In the beginning, back when my condition was worsening, I was always trying to hide it from others. It was like that commercial: “Don’t let them see you sweat.”
When I got married, though it took me quite a while to tell Mr. Quantum when I found myself in that Panic Pickle, I soon realized that he was not only HELP, but a safe haven. He was a guide to help me out of the brine.
I still seek to work on helping myself out. I have learned that fighting it – trying to stop it from happening – only makes it worse, gives it power over me. Thus, my mantra has become, “don’t fight it.” I want to be able to get back by and to myself, but I also want to be courageous enough to get help when I need it.
Interestingly enough – having just re-read this, I’m reminded that a song I used to write my ABOUT page begins with, “Lost and alone on some forgotten highway.” Perhaps it has been in my stars to be lost, and to be alright about it. After all self acceptance is a key to moving forward on my inner journey and finding myself.
And that’s another area of life that I didn’t even touch on. I’ve spent my early days not even knowing about my inner journey… but then that generally comes after going through learning the basics of living, and then getting acquainted with the roller coaster ride of living in the emotional realm. When I finished with all that chaos of figuring things out, I realized there was a spiritual journey part to this living situation. I spent too many decades wanting to be more spiritual, not knowing that I already was, and finally having that epiphany that I’d been surfing on the fringe of my Spiritual Life. It is a balancing act, and finding that balance always gets me unlost.
What was the question?
Quantum Hermit 